


Safety comes at a cost

by MatchBoy



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: A child I say, Dadza, Deadass a kid, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Immortal Philza Minecraft, Immortal Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Like still 16 but still he’s a kid, Other, Physical Pain, Process of death, Regret, Revenge, TOMMYS GONE CRABRAVE, Tommy dies lmao, Tommy is a child, Tommy misses his family, Traumatized Tommyinnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, descriptions of death, i cried writing this lmao, it’ll get better I promise, kinda? Comfort for Tommy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:22:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28900347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MatchBoy/pseuds/MatchBoy
Summary: Tommy felt the blood bubbling from his lips, he didn’t want the last scene he saw to be her angry frown at him. It didn’t suit her, it gave him the same feeling when his father was disappointed at him.“Please, Nikki”
Comments: 39
Kudos: 492





	1. A child and his memories

**Author's Note:**

> TW// Blood, Death, uhhh lowkey gore ig its p lowkey tbh

Tommy was brash. He was stubborn. He was annoying. He was a nuisance. 

He knew all of these things, deep down. Of course he wasn’t going to let people know he believed them. No, he was too confident for that. 

It wasn’t fair, he thought. He had screamed it at his older brothers. 

It wasn’t fair. 

It wasn’t fair that people forgot he was a child, no matter how much he spews about being a ‘big man’. 

Maybe they convinced themselves, maybe they were respecting him and treating him like a adult. It was Tommy, who had pushed that. 

He couldn’t help but feel the burning jealousy in his chest, arms, eyes, face, every part of his nerves that would light with a blinding fury every time he saw his father fussing over others. 

Why couldn’t that be him. What was wrong with him. 

Technoblade had fussed over him for a while, wether is was because he was stealing from him or because he cared was unknown to Tommy. 

Tommy remembers when it was just the four of them, his dad and brothers. 

Attention on him most of the time, his abandonment issues making him want them close. 

He remembers the burn that touch would leave his skin feeling for hours until he got used to affection. 

He remembers the first time he hugged his family. Gods his dad was a wreck. 

He remembers being their lil Toms, their baby brother. 

He remembers when they found Tubbo and suddenly he had to share, he didn’t mind after a while because Tubbo was nice. 

Tommy remembers when he decided that Tubbo was his bestfriend. He remembers the way Tubbos eyes shined and the waver in his voice when he said ‘I’ve never had a bestfriend before’

He remembers coming to the esempee, he remembers meeting everyone he considers his friends, his family. 

He just doesn’t know when he stopped being their family as well. 

It’s sorta ironic, he thinks, sitting on his knees. The stinging in his eyes, the tears that have enough salt in them for him to feel on the scrapes that cover his cheek. The numb ache of the bruises he knows should form. The blood he’s currently coughing up, spilling from his lips. 

He sees her eyes staring down at him, the anger in them reminds him of Dream. 

He remembers his older brothers ghost, telling him one night, when he was in exile. 

“When you’re dying for real, for the last time your life flashes before your eyes and then suddenly it’s dark, if not for a moment” 

His brothers ghost forgot they had the conversation nearly directly after, or maybe he didn’t and he just pretended he did. Tommy should really ask him. 

A white hot pain shot through him, his eyes finding the source of it. Trailing down to his abdomen. 

Ah. 

He’s not going to be able to ask ghostbur now. 

He remembers this feeling, it’s a bit different then the other times. This one feels slower, the rising ash he felt in his throat as he convulsed. 

His head light from lack of oxygen and the blood he’s currently losing because of the sword sticking out of him. 

He needs to calm himself, this isn’t him. 

He’s Tommy, a brother, a friend, a child and the last thing he does isn’t going to be showing how panicked he is. 

Acceptance comes easier than he expected. 

There’s a certain numbness to him now. 

He looks into her eyes again, a small twitch of his lips. He has a last request. 

“Hey” his voice is gurgled, scratching at every muscle inside of his throat. He coughs, blood sputtering out. 

“Do you-“ his voice sounds like he’s on the verge of crying, he coughs again, not now he’s not going to cry now. 

“Do you think you can smile at me? Just one more time” 

She frowned, she looks angry. Well, she is the one killing him isn’t she. 

He doesn’t care, he can’t take it. Knowing his last memory of her will be of her angry frown. It always made him feel like he had disappointed his sister. His dad had the same frown sometimes. It gave him the same feeling. 

“Why woul-“ He coughed again, cutting her off. He can’t hear her anyways, she’s getting blurry. He can feel a ringing in his head, it’s getting to much. 

His eyes are heavy, they hurt. Everything hurts if he’s being honest. 

He closes his eyes for a second, if he tries hard enough he can pretend he’s laying in the field by his childhood home. Before everything. Before the war, before his brother died. Before his father abandoned him, before he left his oldest brother. Before Dream, before he was forced to leave Tubbo. 

Oh Tubbo he wanted to see him. 

He wanted his family. 

He wanted his dad. 

But he couldn’t have that so he opened his eyes again. 

His wheezing breath sounded so pitiful, he blinked the tears out of his eyes to meet her gaze again. 

“Please? Nikki I don’t-“ His chest hurt, his chest hurt real badly. He couldn’t hear his short wheezing breathes anymore. He couldn’t hear anything over the ringing. 

He felt his mouth moving, he wasn’t sure what he was saying. He could feel the blood constricting his words. He couldn’t hear anything. 

He felt hands grab him, he wasn’t sure who it was but the hold on him was so warm. It felt nice. He didn’t feel anything else. 

He felt like they were talking to him, he could feel the vibrations. They were whispering into his hair. That felt nice. 

He wanted to touch them, he wanted to look up at them but he couldn’t open his eyes. 

He felt someone kiss his head, was it the same person who was holding him? 

No, no there were more arms holding him. These ones felt different, thinner, less warm but they filled his body with so much comfort. He wanted to stay there forever. 

He felt someone rubbing his back, ah that was nice. That felt really nice. He knew he was slipping away, he was tired. 

He knew he was dying as well, dying. He was dying. He felt himself jump, his hands grabbed the first thing they could find. It felt like fur. It felt nice in his hand, he might have taken the time to appreciate it if he wasn’t shaking so much. 

The calming presence was back, it made him relax. His bodies last effort to make him get up was gone. His energy was used up. He felt his throat give a wet cough, he wanted to rest his neck. 

His neck hurt, so he completely relaxed. His eyes slipped shut completely as he let go of his last wheezing breath. His chest caving in with no air to keep it moving. 

He didn’t feel the pain anymore he didn’t. He didn’t feel anything. 

When he opened his eyes again, he was in a dark room. He felt small again. He touched his stomach, no blood no nothing. He was scared. Where was he? 

Where was his family? 

“Dad?” There was no answer  
“Techie!” He heard something move, his head swivelled but he couldn’t see anything in the dark. 

“Wilby! Tubbo where is everyone! “ 

He felt like crying, his hands gripping his hair. 

“Tommy?”

A sob left him, he knew that voice. It was different than what it had been for the past few months. His eyes opened and sure enough, there he was. 

His older brother, not the ghost that was only a reminder of him. It was his brother. 

He dropped into his arms, he grabbed around his chest and held on like his life depended on it. 

“Tommy- Toms what- what are you doing here?” 

Gods he missed his brothers voice, it was grounding, more than the ghost of his brothers ever was. The wispy, air to his voice was gone, his brother, real brother, crazy and all was with him. He couldn’t help the sob that left his throat, he was so relieved. 

“I missed you so much, please don’t leave again, don’t leave please” he felt the pleads fall from his tongue quicker than anything before. He didn’t want to loose his brother again. 

There was a hand petting his head, it felt nice. It felt like how it used to be, when they were young and had no worries. After they all had bonded as a family and Tommy needed to be in physical contact with them all. 

He heard his brothers calm shushes, he remembers how this is how it used to be when he had nightmares. Wilbur comforting him through the night. 

“It’s okay Toms you’re safe, I promise” 

Gods did that feel good, the feeling of being safe, it wasn’t common for him anymore. Not since they came to the esempee. A shuddering breath left him as he nodded into his brothers neck, he felt safe for the first time in years. 

It was nice.


	2. A/N

Hey shitheads love ya from last chapter anyways I promised a few people I would update but like lmao that was a lie oops 

TW\\\ mental health and ED subject 

My ED has gotten real bad so I’m workin on that besides the fact I have a shit ton of stupid shit happening and just wanna sleep but can’t lmao insomnia anyways yeah can’t see how the next chapter is comin anytime soon so til then you can catch me coping unhealthy with weed, alcohol and cigarettes. 

On a happy note my emotional support cousin came over for the first time in a week and that was nice I got to talk about my feelings LMAO 

Have a good day ya shits


	3. The Immortal, The Warrior and The Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A family processes the death of their youngest, not well but they do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who’s back and feeling better yeah bitches it’s me 
> 
> Immortal Philza and Immortal Technoblade? POG 
> 
> Traumatized Tubbo? Not so POG 
> 
> Yo my girlfriend made me a Spotify playlist that she said reminded her of me and one of the songs was “I hate everyone but you” by Elita and when I tell you I almost cried /sigh/ I’m simply a sad person but a sad person in love so :,)
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy this chapter,,,, there will be a fourth one hopefully most likely

Philza didn’t consider himself a soft man, not by any standards. His moniker of ‘Angel of death’ was earned after all. He has lived through many centuries, there was never a constant until he found Techno. 

Techno his first son, the one who never dies. The only other immortal he has ever had the pleasure of meeting. 

He didn’t expect the unusual softness that came with fatherhood and he definitely didn’t expect the other children who would win into his affections. 

He had known they would die, at some point. He had thought he would get years, a life time for them and a small blip in his years. 

Staring down at his youngest, blood seeping him his still cooling body filled him with a indescribable emotion. 

It wasn’t anger or grief, he felt broken. Empty. A piece of his soul had been chipped off and taken from him as he watched his son, his baby’s eyes loose their light. 

Philza Minecraft is a immortal with too many secrets, yet he is a father as well. A failed one at that. 

Technoblade had been guarded from a young age, it’s how he was raised. How it had to be. The nether wasn’t a nice place, you steal, kill, cheat and you survive. He has seen many fall to illness, to a blade, to the desperate. 

He thought he would be prepared, maybe for the fact that the only person he had around enough to be attached to was also immortal. 

He was a guarded creature by nature but even his walls had weak points and the little boy in his lap knew exactly where they were. 

He didn’t expect him to be gone, just like that. His little brother, the youngest of them gone. 

At first he felt anger, he wanted to rage and destroy everything. He wanted them to hurt. 

As he looks to his father, staring with empty eyes at the body of the youngest he feels something in him break. 

As he looks to his younger brother, wailing, sobs wracking his small body. Begging for the youngest to open his eyes. He feels that something crack more. 

He’s a warrior first and foremost, he thrives in bloodshed and war but as he stares at the broken form half curled on him. As he looks at the cold bloody hand fisted into the fur lining of his cloak, he thinks for the first time in his long life that he doesn’t like death. He thinks for the first time, as he smells the familiar copper of blood, that he can’t stand it. 

Tubbo couldn’t believe what he was looking at. His bestfriend and brother crumpled in his families arms, gone. 

He felt the warmth of his tears sliding over his cheeks, snot coming from his nose as he screamed his throat raw and dry. 

His hands clutching to Tommy’s lifeless one. He knows he’s begging everything, anything, the universe even to give Tommy back. He can feel words leave his tongue and the vibrations from his throat but he can’t hear it over the ringing in his ears. 

He can’t stop focusing on where the wound in Tommy’s stomach is, so, so similar to their older brother.

He couldn’t stop the laughter that left him, it was a crazed thing. The broken high pitched sobs ringing through his laughter as he processed that his brother was truly gone. That he wasn’t with him anymore. 

Dead. His chest unmoving, there’s no air. No witty remarks. No quips. No banter. No cussing. All there was is silence. 

Ghostbur wasn’t sure what had happened, why was his family sitting around Tommy. 

Oh, Tommy had a cut like him! They were matching now. 

Oh that’s not good is it, no it wasn’t. 

Ghostbur didn’t know why but he felt like he didn’t want to know what happened. He didn’t want to go over to his family. 

Slowly, He became translucent and left. He needed to find friend, he decided. 


End file.
